4 Remedies to Conquer Rejection

 

by Barbara Latta @barbaralatta

“Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me!” This often-taunted phrase is a lie. Words can hurt worse than a physical injury and last much longer. 

Bullying has always been around, but it seems more prevalent now than ever before. Children are exposed to torment from others and this can cause emotional scars that can take years to heal if not dealt with properly. Too many kids have even committed suicide because of what others have said or done to them.

We, as parents, grandparents, and friends can help our children and students by teaching them how valuable they are, and how much they are loved by God.

Rejection Isn’t Always Through Abuse

We can have a great life in one area and still experience rejection in other areas of our lives and the effects can be just as devastating if left unchecked.

My home was very loving and kind. I didn’t grow up with abuse, foul language, yelling, drugs, alcohol or lack.

But there were times when I felt the ultimate rejection.

I was shy. I didn’t initiate friendships easily or participate in games and sports; therefore, when teams were formed, I was the last one chosen.

I wasn’t the cute kid who won the little beauty contests. No one ever told me I was ugly, but my ears always perked up when someone else was told how pretty they were. So, my mind said, “You’re ugly.”

I worked hard to make good grades and when another student surpassed me, the voices in my head would start again, “You don’t measure up.”

So, do you get my point? I was allowing rejection to form in my mind based on my perception of what others were doing or saying. 

Although I wasn't bullied, this is what bullying can cause. The words heard and the treatment experienced is accepted in their minds and it grows a root.

The fruit of that root produces:

Seclusion – we avoid the risk of relationships to prevent being hurt again.

Anger and aggressiveness – we shun and hurt others by our actions.

Depression – we wallow in self-pity and the endless cycle of hopelessness and despair grows and can cause physical sickness.

Hyper-sensitivity – we display hurts seeking for justification in our feelings and become easily offended.

The Rejection Jesus Faced

No one has ever experienced the amount of rejection Jesus faced. In every area of His life, He faced ridicule and abuse in some form.

• Jesus was rejected by the religious leaders (John 11:53).
• He was rejected by his hometown (Luke 4:28-29).
• He was rejected by his followers (John 6:66).
• He was rejected by the Twelve (Matthew 26:26, Mark 24:50.
• He was rejected by his family (Mark 3:21).

In of all this rejection, Jesus stayed focused on fulfilling God’s will. As the Son of Man, he had the ability to feel the same emotions we feel; but as the Son of God He remained true to His purpose. He didn’t let the rejection of others sway what He knew He had to do. His spirit overcame His emotions (Mark 14:36). We have the same ability to overcome our feelings by the power of the Holy Spirit (John 16:33).

Here are 4 remedies we can use to conquer rejection in ourselves or help others conquer their feelings:

1. Put more value on what God says about us than what other people or circumstances tell us.
2. Surround ourselves with others who are committed to God. Our close relationships should be with committed Christians. We don't need to avoid other people, but we shouldn't spend so much time with unbelievers that their attitudes start to change us. Jesus didn’t avoid sinners, but when he was around them he changed the atmosphere; he didn’t let the atmosphere change him.
3. Realize rejection is a part of life on a fallen earth. It isn't going away, but we can learn to reject the feelings this causes instead of absorbing them. We do this by meditating on Scripture that tells us how much God loves us and accepts us.
4. Forgive because Christ forgave us. All those who rejected Jesus were forgiven by Him. Even Judas—the one who never received the forgiveness extended to him.

The ultimate rejection Jesus experienced was when His Father had to turn away. “My God, my God, why have your forsaken me? (Matthew 27:46).  He did this so we could be accepted. 

This was the worst thing that had ever happened to Him. For all eternity Jesus had been in union with His Father. Even after He laid aside the benefits of His deity to come to earth, He still had the fellowship with God until His Father had to turn away because of the sin that had been laid upon His Son. 

Jesus was willing to endure the worst rejection of His life so we could be accepted. That shows us how valuable we are to Him.

Just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved (Ephesians 1:4-6 NKJV).

Someone else’s treatment of you doesn’t reflect your value. Jesus said we were all worth dying for. That should make all the difference in the world. (click to tweet)

 Join the conversation and share your thoughts on how to remedy rejection