I read another article this week about bullying which caused me to want to address the issue on this blog. This activity has become so prevalent over the years that it has become a hot topic in news stories, magazines, and social media. Teachers and counselors try to offer solutions but these remedies do not address the heart issue. Behavior modification will not work permanently because the crux of the matter is a damaged soul.
People can become bullies because of inner wounds inflicted upon them by abuse, abandonment, and feelings of unworthiness. They then try to overcome these emotions by overpowering others through intimidation and violence.
When situations in life cause us to feel rejected, we all compensate in some way to try to overcome it. Rejection hurts and we try to heal ourselves any way we can. For some that means inflicting pain on others.
To help someone overcome a bullying mentality we need to:
- Convince them that God loves them (I John 4:10).
- Show them God's forgiveness (Colossians 3:13).
- Reveal that they are accepted and not rejected by God (Ephesians 1:4-6).
- Remind them they will never be alone (Hebrews 13:5).
- Teach them to change their way of thinking (Romans 12:2)
Following these guidelines will teach a person they don’t have to exert power over others to feel accepted.
The victim of a bully will suffer the same consequences of feeling rejection and shame. In some cases, this could cause a vicious cycle of creating another offender. Both the victim and the bully need to know that God’s love goes deep, heals hurts, and restores life.
Intimidation and fear cause more wounds for the bully and the victim. God’s way is the real power. Not power over someone, but power through Someone.
Have you been a victim or a bully, or do you know someone who has?